To the Cottage: Take a drink

At the cottage now. The water here has to run a while before you can use it. When you turn the faucet on in the kitchen the pungent bite of sulfur assaults your nose like a nail gun put one through your nostrils. It was as though someone ate a bunch of eggs and let one loose in your face. I was thirsty, but not that thirsty.

***

This morning I took a shower, the shower smelled the strongest sulfur I have ever smelled. It reminded me of Bumpass Hell trail in Lassen National Park, where there are all those steaming yellow sulfur vents. I wanted to take a shower, but I didn’t want to smell like an eggy-fart incarnate all day. So I waited for the smell to die down. Loo scolded me for wasting water here, of all places, and I jumped in the shower when it was the least egg fart smelling.

Everyone else thought that I was in the bathroom stinking up the place because of the smells that leaked under the door. They tried not to bring it up for awhile but finally Loo had to ask if everything was OK with me intestinally this morning.

“It was the shower. It has that sulfur smell, got to let the water run awhile to clear it.” They agreed it was a strong smell. I wasn't sure if they believed me or not, but I didn't say anything more.

***

I took a nap and after I woke up I started writing in my own room. Loo just came in here and started punching me in the spine, starved for attention. All I do is be grumpy and be anti-social she says. I thought about it, how I look to her right now, in my room typing alone. Maybe I am being anti social now, but she was text messaging people for a long stretch of time, so I left to write.

“What are you writing about?” she asked.

“Here, the cottage, the trip. I wrote about dandelions, and Coyles, and the sulfur shower.”

“Dear Diary, Beyo here, yesterday I walked into the cottage and looked at the ceiling, it was white. The end. I mean, what could you write about? We haven’t done anything yet.”

“I never been here before, there is plenty to write about.”

“Nobody is going to want you to review their food or hotels or anything.”

“Why is that?”

“Cause you’re painting a negative picture of the place, the cottage is cool.”

“How cool is the sulfur shower?”

“You could say it has a fresh mineral water feel.”

“That smells like the eggy farts of a hundred dudes trapped in a sauna?”

“Leave that part out, and maybe put a positive spin on it, even if it was bad.”

“Like ‘the sweet fragrance of sulfur greets you in the shower,’ something like that? Stop punching me in the spine.” She started punching me in the shoulder.

“No, sulfur stinks.”

“Yeah. I know. Can you stop punching me, please?”

“You don’t do anything.”

“I'm not your monkey. Stop punching or I’ll punch you back.” She didn’t stop. So I punched her in the leg.

“Why do you got to punch so hard!?”

“Told you to stop,” I said. She left. I felt like an idiot. Way to be the adult Brian.

***

After we made up, and I gave her a massage to make up for the punch we went for a walk. I got very tired suddenly and we had to go back and I fell asleep within a minute of me walking inside the cottage. I slept for a couple hours. The kayaking for six hours must have tired me out.

I eased into consciousness slowly and gradually I became aware of doors opening and closing.

"I don't know Gammy, where did you have it last?"

"I don't know Laura."

"Did you leave it at the Kayak guy's office?"

"Oh Goll. I just dont know," she said. Her phone rang, it was Ma, Loo's mom and Gammy's daughter. Gammy explained how she lost her check book, misplaced it, and was just beside herself about what to do. Loo and Ma offered suggestion after suggestion. Call the places you used your check book at, ask the kayak man, check the car, retrace your steps. I was unaware that she had been searching for it for the last two hours.

I took my time waking up, stretching, and finally getting up. I wasn't that excited to make my awareness known to her lest she make me search for it too. I walked out my room, too fast, and got lightheaded and saw black. I leaned against a wall and waited for my vision to come back before I felt thirsty and wanted a little bottle of water--that is to say a bottle of water that didn't come from the cottage, water that smelled and tasted like eggy fart.

I walked into the sun room and grabbed a water. On the ground next to the water was a checkbook. I picked it up and walked over to Gammy's room. As I wiped sleep from my eyes I handed her the check book.

"Is this yours?" I asked.

"Never mind Ma, Bear found it," Loo said and hung up the phone.

"Where did you find that!?" Gammy asked, her eyes locked on the checkbook.

"In the sun room," I said and drank some water. She took the checkbook and hugged me. I hugged her back and she hugged me harder. Then she stopped and placed a hand on my right arm above the elbow and stepped back.

"You help me out so much," she said with quivering lips and tear filled eyes, "thank you. Truly."

"You are welcome," I said surprised by her tears.

"You fixed the cottage door, and the screen [I forgot to mention that, pretend I told you that earlier] and now this. Thank you."

"My pleasure. I'm sorry I didn't wake up sooner, I could have saved you some time and stress," I said and I meant that. She smiled, teared up more, gave my arm a final squeeze and mouthed a silent thank you before leaving. After saying the wrong thing to her all the time I had finally said the right thing.

"Nice job Bear, she was flipping out so bad I think I was losing MY mind."

"You're welcome."

"This will endear her to you now, you know."

"It's about time. I was getting tired of messing up every one of her games and saying the wrong things. You think she'll let us stay in the same room now?"

"Are you kidding? Not a chance."

"So we better leave now and pretend to be platonic while under her gaze."

"Yeah, gimme hug and then scram. No funny business now."

"Kay," I said. I hugged her. She grabbed my butt and gave it a squeeze before laughing maniacally.

"Ahh Loo, how I love you."